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The power of words (and how I'm trying to find mine again)

8/8/2016

3 Comments

 
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I've been having a difficult time blogging. I didn't used to have this problem. Years ago, when blogging was still fairly unchartered territory for the average person, I started a blog for my event planning company. It was easy for me then, mostly because you could share ideas and opinions and the only people who might even read them were the people who already mostly supported you. Even those who didn't agree with something didn't feel the need to spend a lot of time in angry response. The biggest "risk" about blogging back then was was that no one would read your blog at all. {"Hello? Is anyone out there?"}
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Today, it's not the prevalence of blogs that make me apprehensive to write again; it's that the internet has become a mean, unforgiving place. Now, people don't just disagree with a a complete stranger's honest opinion; they publicly stone them for sharing it in the first place. A blogger can become Public Enemy #1 with the single click of the "Post" button.

Somewhere along the way, the right to free speech became the right to tarring and feathering. Between the Grammar Police and the Judgement Squad, the bullies are out in full force. And to be perfectly honest here, I'd much rather just be quiet and not say anything than risk that toxicity.

Life is hard enough. I know my faults and weaknesses. I worry I'm a good enough mom, wife and friend. I have been hurt enough by people who are supposed to love me that I certainly don't feel the need to sign up for the accusations from those who don't even really know me.

When I write about Intentional Kindness, I am writing to myself. I am sharing what I've learned personally as well as what I am trying to learn. I am not posting from a place of self righteousness or condemnation. I don't walk around handing out flowers, balloons and compliments all day (I know...shocking, right?). The only thing I honestly feel I'm better at than anyone else is being about as flawed and imperfect as they come. That's where my confidence begins and ends, folks.

So I'm trying to let go of fear, as my friend Bob Goff has encouraged me to do. Fear of judgement and mistakes and struggles. I'm hoping you'll read along and know my intentions here are to encourage and be encouraged. It takes a lot of fearlessness to put ourselves out there in this world. We are going to BE INTENTIONAL in our words and actions and we are going to face some rejection along the way.

​I'm here for you when that happens. I'm hoping you'll be there for me, too.
3 Comments
Chris Baker
8/8/2016 06:42:26 pm

I could not agree more on all points. For 7 years I have celebrated my birthday with The Birthday Project yet, except for those who really know me and my heart, I never share about it. Why? Because I do not want to be ridiculed for "self-promoting".

This year's birthday (which was just days ago) almost did not go as I had planned; I'm so glad I followed through because some of the comments I received at just the smallest act of kindness, we're life changing! And, something happened TO me (in the form of kindness) that I did not expect that completely left me speechless and humbled.

Keep using your words because they are being heard.

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Jon Mueller
8/8/2016 08:08:56 pm

Step one. You're on your way. Fearlessness is such a great zone to be in. It has opened me up to talk to all kinds of people I would not have otherwise. Keep up the great work. This is my birthday month and I am working on something marginally fantastic.

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Bridget
8/11/2016 08:32:57 am

It's true that people seem more willing than ever to post and spread cruel things on the internet. But, you can't let this stop you from speaking your truth. I love the Bday project!!! We need more voices spreading love and kindness in this world. Don't ever stop!! When you feel afraid, listen to Brene Brown. I especially like her talk about why you should not let critics matter https://youtu.be/8-JXOnFOXQk

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    Robyn Bomar; Founder of The Birthday Project; Kindness Consultant, Wife, Mom, Friend.

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